Squash Those Stem Cells
New Screening Could Lead to More Potent Cancer Drugs
A team at the Broad Institute, a Harvard-M.I.T. collaborative for genomics research, has devised a way of screening for drugs that attack cancer stem cells but leave ordinary cells unharmed.
Big Story… not without controversy.
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The Doctor is Within
We can’t change the world except insofar as we change the way we look at the world — and, in fact, any one of us can make that change, in any direction, at any moment. The point of life, in the view of the Dalai Lama, is happiness, and that lies within our grasp, our untapped potential, with every breath.
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Reform or Replace?
I am in awe of the Obama administration for taking on the impossible and I applaud their attempt to reform a broken health care system, but I have to admit that for me its just not enough. I want single payer, universal health care for all Americans. Yes, I am a dreamer. We in the United States could NEVER have that. So what we settle for is reform of the current system.
Reform, reform, reform. I hope they can pass legislation to get control of this situation. It isn’t clear to me who is going to play watchdog over the practices of the insurance companies while we work so hard at getting everyone insured. How are we going to make sure that all care is covered? And nobody is dropped from their plan? I mean, with the system we have, how can we blame insurance companies for trying to increase profits for their shareholders at the expense of patients? Unfortunately, profit is health care is not driven by quality care, but by reducing patient care. When Wendell Potter spoke out about the evil practices of Cigna, he blew the whistle on Wall Street driven health care… but what has changed? Hundereds of Americans are still being denied care every day, and insurance companies are reporting record profits this year.
This could affect all of us someday, even if you are a healthy person. In my case, I am a healthy person with a PRE-EXISTING CONDITION. The dreaded label. I am somewhat dependent on routine scans, and I have no idea how much those cost my insurance company. I might have to continue these for the rest of my life, who knows. At any rate, I know that the premiums for my employer go up every year, and each year we need to settle for less. I am also very concerned that when I change my job someday I may just lose coverage because of my dreaded label. And what if I am self employed someday? Will I be able to get insurance? These are my fears, and that is why I advocate replacement of this system over reform.
Health care should be a basic human right, not a “benefit” that we share with our employer. And the fate of our health should never be in the hands of an insurance “specialist” employee of an insurance company. Health care decisions should be made BY THE PATIENT under the guidance of a doctor with access to medicine and procedures that are at a basic cost. Where is all the money going to come from? For starts, lets take a look at reform of our defense spending!
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Does early cancer screening actually reduce risk? Some interesting ideas in this story, and its one of the first I have read that mentions slow growing cancer that does not require treatment.
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Crack the Code
Me gustan buenas noticias! Latest set of results from the tube say I am UBER stable.
I celebrated my birthday last week, the end to one of the most awesome years of my life. They keep getting better! So many good things to be thankful for. New friends, old friends, more awareness, more gut busting laughter, more contentment, more “first time” experiences. Aunt Helen’s secret to long life: Don’t sweat the small stuff. It works! Breathe deep and kiss the person nearest to you!
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Cancer Researchers Play it Safe
NY Times article:
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Allium sativum
One of the five things in life I can’t live without is the fine goodness of garlic, Allium sativum. I worship it like an Egyptian, it is a staple of my diet every day. I believe it keeps my immune system strong and my skin healthy.
I’m not going to go into detail about its chemical composition or all the illnesses it might cure. If you want to read more about that you can check wikipedia or googlepedia. I simply eat it because I believe it is good for your health, and I love the way it tastes. Roasted garlic is sweet, like candy, and will never give you bad breath. Sauteed garlic is also nice, but a little more aromatic. Never let garlic turn dark brown and crispy in the sautee pan. Time your chopping and prep work well so you don’t burn your garlic. Add it to the pan at the correct time with your other foods so it doesn’t overcook. It does absolutly no good to have charred garlic mixed into your food. I always chop garlic by hand. In the Les Halles cookbook, Anthony Bourdain totally dissed the garlic press, and I pretty much agree with him. It may be good for a puree though.
Wendy’s Garlic Paste: Roast, Smash, Dash.
•Roast two or three bulbs of garlic in the oven at 350º for 45 minutes, until soft. After they cool down, the cloves should slip right from their papers when you peel them. If they are sticky when you peel them, wet your fingers so they don’t stick to your hands.
•In a bowl, smash all the cloves with a fork until you make a paste. If the cloves don’t smash easily into a paste, wrap them in foil and put them back in the oven until they do. The exact amount of time is found by trial and error with your own oven temp.
•Add a couple tablespoons of olive oil to the garlic paste, but not too much. You don’t want to overpower the sweet garlic flavor. A dash of salt and its finished. Spread on a toasted baguette and your ready to go.
Keeps for a week, maybe two, in the fridge.
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What are Friends For? A Longer Life
NY Times story about friendship and health…like I need another reason to hang out with my awesome friends…
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Diet: Cooking
Food Preparation
My approach to preparing food is Keep it Simple. I occasionally cook elaborate dishes that keeps my nose in a cookbook while I cook, but thats just for sport. I mostly cook simple meals on the stovetop that don’t take a lot of time or alchemy. I read cookbooks for inspiration and ingredients, then elaborate with substitutions and additional ingredients. I cook intuitively and have no qualms about sprinkling a fish with cinnamon or spreading roasted garlic on a sweet bread. I love discovering that seemingly disparate tastes can actually compliment each other. I mostly cook local foods that are in season, and cook in ways that are appropriate to the season. (Roast chicken in July? Not a good idea if you don’t have air conditioning). I prepare cooked foods year-round, and I eat raw food in the warmer seasons. I would guestimate that 60% of my diet is fruit + vegetables, 25% is starch, and 15% is meat protein. That is something that I try my best to maintain but changes occasionally, like when I travel.
Quantity/Storage/ Transport.
I am a zojirushi geek. The zojirushi craze went around my office a year ago and a few of us carry our food around in these japanese thermoses. When I cook, I prepare pretty large quantities so I have food to bring to work for lunch all week. This means I know what I am eating and I save a lot of money too. Its very economical to shop at the farmers market and cook for yourself. A lot of people balk at paying $3 for an heirloom tomato and then go pay $12 for a salad at a chain like “Chopp’t”. When I cook greens for dinner, I make twice as much as I need so I have greens for lunch the next day. Enough brown rice is prepared in the evening to last for 5 days. Beans are pressure cooked and stored in the freezer until needed. Sweet potatoes are cooked en masse so they are ready to be reheated anytime. I try my best not to find myself with no food in the fridge.
Heat/Reheat.
At home I cook everything on the stovetop and in the oven. And I make good use of a toaster oven, because I LOVE BREAD. At my office we have a microwave and I use it to heat my lunch if needed. I really dislike this, but I have not figured out another way to do it yet. I use cast iron and stainless steel for cooking. No teflon or weird synthetic surfaces that end up in your food. Cooking oils are extra virgin olive oil or local unsalted butter, which is delicious. I like to control the amount of salt in my food, so if I want salt on my butter I do it myself.
For more on cooking oils, see the previous post Fried Foods.
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Traditionally, the link between cancer and diet has been a spivy, nebulous area of alternative and wishful thinking. We have all read about someone who, after being told that there was nothing else the doctor can do to cure her cancer, decided to go to Macrobiotic camp as a last resort. If it turned out that she beat the odds, it was always just another unproven testimonial… could have been anything that did it. With my latest shrinking lymph node discovery (they are SO going away!) I feel justified in sharing my own diet testimonial, and plus its my blog and I can do as I wish. Keep in mind that nothing I write should be seen as a substitute for medical care from a qualified doctor. I and my doctor have both agreed that I do not need any conventional treatments at this time, and he doesn’t give a hoot what I eat. So I’m doing this on my own, but I suppose if you have cancer you are already seeing a doctor and by now you have common cancer sense as far as your own treatment goes.
In any case, I am going to begin writing regularly about how I feed myself and the different components of my diet. I have developed a particular eating regime that I have followed for the past two years pretty strictly and it works for me and my incredible shrinking lymph nodes. Today I start with…
The Foundation
1. 90% of what I eat is prepared by moi. I buy and prepare most of my own meals so I know exactly what I am eating. I have a tiny New York kitchen but it is well equipped with a half refrigerator, half freezer, tiny oven and stovetop. The other 10% of the time I eat out in restaurants of various quality because I do have a social life too.
2. I avoid buying processed food. A couple of years ago I decided to stop buying food in that comes in plastic bags and boxes because these are more like a simulacrum of food, not real food. Whole foods are the basis of my diet.
*Whole foods has nothing to do with the supermarket chain…it describes a food that it is in it’s whole, unprocessed state.
3. I shop at three markets. Two farmers markets, and my local food coop. I love to support local farmers so this is where I buy all my vegetables, fruits, bread, dairy, fish, and meat. The coop is where I buy the imports I consume like olive oil, rice, beans, etc.
4. I am not a vegetarian. I buy meat from the farmers market because I know that it was a healthy animal raised in a humane way. I never buy industrial meat because those things they sell you are only a representation of an animal that had a joke of a life. It may look like meat… but it is not. This means that I usually lean heavy towards the vegetables in restaurants unless they are trustworthy and proudly display the nice farm that raised the meat.
5. I am not an “organic only” nut. I tried that, but found that many of the small farmers that I buy from use integrative pest management which uses multiple pest management techniques, including chemical control. Although there is very limited chemical use, it prevents them from being USDA “certified organic,” a very nebulous term. I have learned which are the “hot” fruits and vegetables for pesticide use, and I buy those organic whenever possible.
6. I do not take vitamins regularly. Unless I have a cold and I want to load up on vitamin C, I believe that a balanced diet of real food has all the vitamins I need.
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Muscling Away Cancer – NY Times
People with more lean muscle mass may have an advantage when it comes to fighting cancer, new research suggests.
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Yoshimi Battles the Pink Robots
My hero, Yoshimi, is defending the city against pink robots. She’s a black belt in karate, she knows its demanding to defeat those evil machines, she disciplines her body, and she’s gotta be strong to fight them. I hope that me and Yoshimi have something in common… I really dig her attitude and discipline.
I’ve been reading about “mighty mouse number 6″ in Servan-Schreiber’s book…this crazy lab mouse that was discovered by accident to have extraordinary genetic resistance to cancer. They injected him with virulent cancer cells weighing ten percent of his total body weight, and his own immune system attacked and destroyed the cancer cells…all of them. We all have what they call “natural killer (NK)” cells in our immune system that attack and destroy antigens. Mighty mouse number 6 had some serious NK cells.
Servan-Schreiber relates the growth of cancer to the inflammation process… this is what occurs when a tumor starts growing in an otherwise healthy place. The cancer cell acts like a wound that doesn’t heal…they encourage immune calls to produce inflammation, from which the tumor gets the fuel it needs for its own growth. Pretty insidious little punks, aren’t they?
And then there is angiogenesis…the growth of new blood vessels to service a wound. The blood vessels bring the nutrients that cells need, and carry away their waste. Once again, a tumor will hijack the body’s angiogenesis process and use it to grow and prosper.
By discovering what makes a tumor grow, logically one would think that if we just cut off its lifeline we can impede its growth. Well, apparently tumors are multifaceted, and there is no magical cure-all. What works for one does not always work for another. But, as Servan-Schreiber says, and Yoshimi knows, “by stimulating our immune cells, fighting inflammation (with nutrition, physical exercise, and emotional balance) and fighting angiogenesis, we can undercut cancer’s spread.”
In “The Balance Within,” Esther Sternberg suggests that all the hormonal and nerve pathways that kick in when we are stressed could interfere with the way that immune calls cope with disease. Not all stress is bad, of course, it is a biological necessity that activates us to react during crisis. But how much is too much? What if we suffer from prolonged stress on a daily basis? At what point can emotional imbalance put our immune system at risk?
Yoshimi is disciplined at keeping the stress hormones at bay and staying emotionally and physically balanced so she can defeat the pink robots for sure. Good role model.
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A Perfect Day
Its been a perfect and memorable ass-whoopin’ day. Today I told my oncologist that my supraclavicular lymph nodes are getting smaller, and he agreed… THEY ARE SHRINKING. This has happened under my radar… I have not even been thinking about those little punks much these days. This weekend I gave them a squeeze in anticipation of my appointment today and realized they are smaller. SMALLER.
No coincidence that I am reading David Servan-Schreiber’s Anticancer at the moment. About escaping statistics he writes, “Variation is the vary essence of nature. In nature, the median is an abstraction, a “law” that the human mind tries to impose on the diverse profusion of individual cases.” With the brilliant help of Stephen Jay Gould (also a cancer survivor) who puts survival statistics in perspective by asking us which side of the survival curve we wish to put ourselves on (note that the end of each curve has a long tail at the end… thats where I want to be!), Servan-Schreiber shows that the door to opportunity will open if we just activate ourselves to open it.
This week I am celebrating my three year anniversary since my diagnosis… early December, 2005. I can’t tell you how much has changed since then. I have been doing everything I can to activate my body’s own natural defenses and search for emotional peace, and now I know I must be doing something right, and if luck has anything to do with it, I am thanking my lucky stars too.
Its true there’s no guarantee to the future…who knows what will happen next. But absolute remission is the goal here (does spontaneous apply? After three years, I dunno). Healthy mind and healthy body are the way. Healthy mind means healing the parts that are stuck, tied in knots, up-set, and dis-eased. This is absolutely liberating. To do this, you don’t need to go anywhere or study anything else but yourself. Listen to the way your mind works when you are doing something as stupid as standing on the subway. What kind of person are you nurturing inside? What kind of life-equation are you calculating? What are you craving right now? What’s out there that is any better than what you have right now at this very minute? What’s making you miserable? How bad is it? When children cry, they cry like there is no end in sight to their suffering. Then they get over it an move on. As adults it seems like we cry less and suffer longer.
And like anything else, love the process. You can’t fully appreciate where you are unless you understand how you got there!
Good night.
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Lymph Nodes and Stress is #1
Blog stats are revelatory at times… I must reveal the most curious of mine. I have a post from nearly one year ago that gets more hits than Sarah Palin has winks. People keep searching “lymph nodes and stress” or “does stress make my lymph nodes bigger” and finding my blog post. (I hope that I have not inspired terror in anyone). So far the post has 441 hits.
Whats going on? I don’t know. But there seems to be a lot of people out there with swollen lymph nodes searching the internet for answers. Waxing, waning, googling. What is this phenomenon?
My routine blood tests are coming up on Tuesday, which I trust will go well. Stay tuned.
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Choice in Healing: Feel Normal
Today at work I cleaned those neglected corners of my desk, an activity I only do once a year. On my bookshelf was a copy of Choices in Healing, a book that I kidnapped from the office library about two years ago, with all good intentions of reading. (Our office has a lot of literature about health and healing around, its one of our specialties). As I flipped through it, I realized just how far I’ve come. Two years ago, chapters like “self-healing through imagery” would have been very appealing to me…
After I found out I have cancer I tiptoed. For basically two years I walked around quietly, trying to figure out what the hell I was supposed to do. How I was supposed to feel. How I was supposed to live normally with this enormous weight hanging over my head. Nobody told me it was an option to feel normal. Suddenly this unwelcome visitor had moved in, making me abnormal in my own eyes, so of course I assumed I was in everyone else’s as well. So I changed my diet, went away on a meditation retreat, did acupuncture for two years, joined support groups, fundraised for cancer, started this blog, among other things. The reason I did most of these things was because of cancer, my new partner in life. A few of them eventually metamorphosed into something great and long-lasting, but most of them were left neglected on the shelf like the copy of Choices in Healing at my office.
To be clear, these were all perfectly normal and valid choices in healing to make. And thank god I have had the luck of still bein’ round these parts to even have the chance to let a book gather dust on a shelf. But theres nothing wrong with giving cancer less attention in my life either. The process of letting go of all these endeavors, along with the weight I was carrying, has been the sweetest part of the deal so far, and I have actually come out on the other side of the tunnel feeling better than I did before I entered it. An unexpected bargain!
The best choice I have made yet is to live life exactly as I did before I knew I had cancer. There have most definitely been good changes made (the diet, the cycling, and the yoga for example) that I can’t do without now… but for the most part, I have been able to find myself again. Less patience for tiptoeing and more desire for bad-ass boot stompin’. And, well, more desire in general.
At risk of sounding corny and using the old cancer “gift” cliché, this has been a true gift. Dealing with your own fears is humbling. Self-pity is insidious. But shaking them is truly rewarding. I recommend it!
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Enough is Enough!
Lets face it, the republican campaign is disintegrating into a pathetic display of accusations, exaggerations, and plain old lies that are injecting negativity and fear in the pea-brains of their supporters. Come to think of it, “Winky” Palin’s oratory style reminds me of certain girls at my high school… the language is a very effective way to gather followers and support among easily manipulated people with a limited world view (as in, my world extends to the edge of school grounds…lets skip class and get drunk!). With no other intelligent resources at her disposal, Palin has put the lipstick on the pitbull and shown her true stuff.
But seriously, this is not high school and in the real (?) political world this BS can have serious consequences. And from what is happening at the latest rallies, violence is one probable outcome. Some people are clearly convinced by the lies…and this is a tough crowd of folks that back the NRA and eat at Denny’s (!).
McCain and Palin are demonstrating their political agenda: the same as the one we have endured for the past eight years. We do not need leaders like McCain and Palin who irresponsibly exaggerate facts about their opponent in order to gain support for their losing campaign. This is exactly what Bush did in his “showdown” with Saddam in 2003 to gain support for the invasion of Iraq. Palin was just found guilty of abuse of state power and using state funds to advance her personal agenda. Sound familiar? Abusing one’s elected position to “take someone down” is just not acceptable. Now, by inciting fear of “terrorists” that the Bush administration has entrenched into the minds of Americans, they could also be recklessly endangering Obama’s safety. We need to secure a place of dignity and honor for the US in global politics, and make amends for the past eight years: the unnecessary death, destruction, and global financial collapse that our country is responsible for.
A real presidential contender should speak with intelligence, dignity, and grace. A real presidential contender should campaign on the policies of their party, not lies about the rival party. A real presidential contender should not waste the American public’s time, money, and resources. Enough is enough, folks. We cannot afford to entertain and support the GOP campaign of ridiculous accusations OR this war in Iraq any longer!
23 days till election day…
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Logic
Its good to be back after my summer hiatus. I guess I needed to take a break from living watchfully. Oh what an action-packed summer it was! Lots of cycling, a romantic interlude, and an awesome vacation. What more could a girl want?
A new bike! I am working on that one now.
Something good is happening to my mind and I can’t explain why. Its as if all the curve balls that have been pitched to me in life have actually HELPED. The big picture is clearer, I feel as if I can cut through the shit like Jackie Chan with a scythe!
I have felt so much gratitude lately for everything I am able to experience. The joys of friendships, family, and sharing intimacy without expectation. Obeying the magnet. The flip side is disappointment, always ready to spoil the party, if you allow it.
Life is like a game of logic. We all write our own equations. This plus that equals disappointment. This plus that equals failure. This plus that equals self-pity. If we brood over our chosen equation for a lifetime, it becomes our way of seeing ourselves and the world. If we just change the equation, we can change ourselves and our future! Its true! The self-pity equation is an insidious one. It wants to take hold of us, it steals precious time from happiness, it drags us through the stinky compost heap. When I find myself writing that one I do my best to stop it immediately. Bad equation. Leads to negative places.
I am fancying myself as a mathematician these days, writing equations for gratitude, positive feelings towards others, and positive feelings about myself. Feels good.
At risk of being repetitive I must post the Rumi poem again. It is so a propos.
The Guesthouse
This being human is a guesthouse
Every morning a new arrival
A joy, a depression, a meanness
Some momentary awareness
Comes as an unexpected visitor
Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they’re a crowd of sorrows
Who violently sweep your house
Empty of its furniture
Still treat each guest honorably
He may be cleaning you out
For some new delight!
The dark thought, the shame, the malice
Meet them at the door laughing
And invite them in
Be grateful for whoever comes
Because each has been sent
As a guide from the beyond
(Translated by Coleman Barks)
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Birthdays
Each year that I toast another birthday with friends I feel more good fortune than ever. Birthdays are a huge accomplishment that we should recognize and not deny! Growing older is an opportunity that shouldn’t be taken for granted.
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stable is my favorite word…
All good news….details posted tonight!
Today Julie and I went to get the results from Dr. Marathon which were all good… I am stable and the nodes are “waning”. Absolutely nothing to worry about. Huge sigh of relief.
Today was a big lesson in learning to listen to my body and not my monkey brain. Although I feel totally healthy and have recently completed a Century ride, my monkey brain has been running rampant recently and it had me convinced that my lymphocytes were in deep doo-doo. Even though I take the best care of myself possible, I still always look at my weaknesses (I’m not getting enough sleep! I’m too stressed!) and I don’t give myself a chance to stop and realize EVERYTHING IS JUST FINE, I AM DOING THE BEST I CAN!
Waxing and waning is a normal condition. Last time they waxed, this time they waned. I will have to get used to this and realize that one millimeter doesn’t mean the end. So here I am, feeling renewed to get on with watchfuliving.
Tonight’s celebratory evening started with cycling in the park, then an bottle of Racemo Frascati with an excellent meal of blackfish (its really white) cooked in white wine with spring garlic, onion, fennel (from Julie’s garden), and a huge side of braised chard and beet greens.
xo
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Spooked by Friday 13th
My visit to the tube today was a little DIFFERENT than most I have had. It started out normal… I arrived at 8, they got me juiced and ready for the scan, and I was waiting like a patient patient in the la-z-boy chair in the little closet-sized room. After one hour of waiting, my juice man Danny (lemme buy you a barium cocktail for your birthday, he tells me) breaks the news that the computer isn’t working and they can’t do any PET scans. Never happened before with this machine, he tells me (yes, its Friday the 13th!). So, the solution: they are going to send me (and another juiced patient) to their other Diagnostic Center uptown for our scans. They have called a car service already. So they remove my “port” and eventually the car arrives to pick up me, my new companion and his wife, and haul us uptown, like radioactive refugees, to Columbus Circle. Now, this stuff only stays in the system for a few hours, but apparently nobody bothered to tell the driver that he had radioactive cargo in the seat next to him, or MAYBE HE WOULD HAVE DRIVEN A LITTLE FASTER! I think we got the slowest driver in the city…this guy let every car on sixth avenue cut in front of him.
Our new Center is a sight to behold. About 20 years worth of black stuff coming out of the air vents had accumulated on the walls above the patients in the waiting room. No matter… we didn’t wait long. They took my buddy first, while I hung out in the galley with the technicians. The scanners are always in the basement, and the rooms are always FREEZING cold. Let me tell you, the technicians who work in these places are a very unique bunch! James (the tech) is a tall bald guy who is very friendly and enthusiastic with the needles. The air vent in the ceiling behind his bald head was stuffed full of paper towels that I presumed were to filter the air, after having seen the black gunk in the waiting room. No, he says, they are trying to STOP the air. His enthusiasm didn’t match his skills (or was it Friday the 13th again?) at getting my vein. He made two strikes, and then we called in the pro… a stern faced Indian woman who was speaking to someone in Indian on the phone, takes one minute to stick me, then wheels back over and resumes her conversation.
Sometimes when I’m in the tube I wonder CAN THEY SEE MY THOUGHTS? Can they see the GAS that the barium cocktail gave me? Are they making jokes about my SECTION images? ARE THEY EVEN THERE, OR DID THEY GO TO LUNCH? Not very zen, to be sure.
When all is finished it is 1:00 pm, and I crawl back up to join the rest of the city again, all aglow, in search of food!
Fingers crossed… 
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Radioactive Friday
Radioactive Cats by Sandy Skoglund
Tomorrow night I’ll be carbo-loading because this Friday the 13th my bi-annual scan-o-ramas are coming up! I plan on being there at 8, bright eyed and bushy tailed with a carb-free digestive system to catch up with the folks down in the radioactive zone. Then I’ll be sure to wash it all away afterwards with lots of fresh H2O and a double shot of Stew’s wheatgrass juice at the greenmarket. I think tomorrow’s dinner will be fresh pasta with seafood and fresh strawberries and cream for dessert. Hold the jell-o, Hoss.
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Not Trained for Cleaning
One common assumption that many friends have is that after the Century Ride I would feel sore and exhausted. The funny thing is that I felt really good and energized after the ride….no soreness whatsoever.
Yesterday I spent the day, about 8 hours, cleaning my apartment from top to bottom since I have not cleaned since last year, and it looked like a bomb exploded from the renovation in my bathroom. My body feels wrecked! I am in great shape for riding 100 miles, but definitely not in shape for cleaning!
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Finally!
Preventing Cancer: What If Research Proved That The Causes May Be Found In Our Environment
So glad to see this story! Leave it to Canada to take this step towards understanding cause and prevention…
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Rolling Through the Finish Line!
It is with much happiness and relief that I report that the ride in Tahoe was one of the most amazing experiences in my life. The whole weekend was full of good cycling vibes and we had awesome weather! And what a bonding experience for the whole team!
Our NYC team is a cast of characters from all over the city with two goals in common… helping raise money for cancer research and completing the Century. We all slogged through the early mornings (ugh) and long hills with unphased team spirit. And thank goodness my camera didn’t go completely on the fritz so I could get a few photos along the way.
The flight to Reno was long and uneventful…although luckily I was able to get my (over-3 oz.) chamois cream past airport security at JFK by the skin of my teeth, and we did have a super bumpy landing in Reno. The bus ride to Tahoe was serene in comparison. On the way into town one of the casino signs advertised a tribute to a singer from the 70’s that we all love…you guessed it… Neil Diamond… and we started singing Cracklin Rosie… and couldn’t stop singing it all weekend. It became the anthem of our Century weekend. Our hotel was a mob scene of TNT cyclists from all over the country wheeling their bikes in all directions… quite a scene, reminding us of some kind of Grateful Dead festival for cyclists, with the hotel even providing courtesy towels for the bikes. Despite the tight schedule set by TNT for the weekend, it seemed like Marty and I always found enough time to slack off. We were perpetually late, missed the pre-ride pasta dinner (by accident) and never had the right passes, tickets, or whatever was required for entry to anything. Slackers! We relied on the good graces of others to find meeting points and follow schedules… our Brooklyn buddy Tracey proved to be invaluable in this respect. She would call and text us both 10 times a day to find out where we were and get our butts where they were supposed to be. We have to admit, the most difficult part of the weekend was waking up early in the morning every day.
The day after we arrived we went for a warm up ride on the first part of the route… up the first short but steep climb to Inspiration Point that looks down on Emerald Bay…
Tahoe is spectacular for cycling… clean air, green lake, and the intoxicating scent of pines all around. Everyone was so amped to get on the road after a week away from their bikes. Me and Marty both felt good and the climb gave us confidence for the next day when we rode the full distance. We could definitely feel the altitude… I was breathing in double time at the top of the hill! Hsiao-Chien and Horng- Shen Tu came out from San Francisco for a couple of nights to enjoy Tahoe and cheer us on.
Food Report: Of course I brought about 5 pounds of my own food and power bars to fuel us over the weekend… I always ride with dried mangos and bananas stuffed in my pockets. Otherwise the food in Tahoe was hit or miss. We had an excellent sushi dinner on Friday at The Naked Fish restaurant: fresh oysters, sesame tuna, black cod, and a tempura cheesecake and red bean mochi for dessert. Who would imagine there would be great sushi in Tahoe? We both thought the meal and service were far superior to New York sushi!
The Century: Go Team! The New York TNT team was the first team in line at the starting point… that means that we had wake up at 4:00 am to be lined up at 5:50 am to lead the pack. We started off nice and steady, and by the time we passed Hsiao-Chien and Horng-Shen they were standing out in front of their B&B in pajamas cheering us on…:). The second time up the switchbacks was a little more difficult than the day before… partly because of the anticipation, but still not a problem. The SAG provisions at the rest stops were awesome… I gorged on fresh fruit at each one. At about mile 20, Marty’s knee started flaring up a bit so we decided to slow the pace, although he never does…seems like he goes faster. The journey along the west side was really lovely in the morning, I’m not sure what the temperature was, but we had to wear layers. We didn’t start to peel layers until the detour to Truckee, which is about mile 50.
The bike path to Truckee…was lovely…calm and tranquil riding along a shallow stream. No struggle to pass others, just a sort of pleasant drifting along. The path eventually merged to a road that ended up at a rest stop at a shopping center that was a mob scene of bikes and people stretched out all over the parking lot.
Photo: Stu Goldstein
Rest stops usually lasted long enough to relieve ourselves, eat and hydrate, and then wander around for 5 mins trying to find each other which was quite a task since everyone wears the same jersey (except me). My size xtra-small jersey was too big for me, so I refused to wear it. By the time we got to mile 50, sunscreen was in order… and lots of it!
The ride back from the Truckee stop was a total slog. The reason they do this detour is that the ride around the lake is not 100 miles, so this completes the Century. I hadn’t realized that the pleasure of riding on a slight incline on the way to Truckee would turn into an annoying ride on the way back. But soon enough we were back onto route 89, making our way around the lake.
Lunch stop: somewhere around mile 70… A lovely lunch spot for hundreds of cyclists!
Thats me, Marty, and Tracey enjoying the breeze and taking a tan…
After lunch: The Hill to Spooner Pass… Now the fun starts! The hill to Spooner is a dreaded 8 mile hill. I surprisingly passed lots of folks walking their bikes here. It was slow going for sure, but very zen. I kept telling myself: no bike, no hill. They offer a rest+water stop midway up the hill, and the conversation went like this: “Hey MJ, wanna stop? I am so tired…” with the reply ” I can’t stop” and then a shrug “ok, lets go!” and off we went! Lots of shouting, huffing and puffing, but we made it to the pass and then continued all the way to the finish without a rest. Lemme tell you how fun it is to ride down from Spooner Pass! We were screaming down those hills so fast and with such relief I had tears in my eyes! Computer says that my maximum speed was 37 mph! Yow!
When the computer says mile 95 I am a very happy girl. And when the high-rise hotels of South Lake Tahoe come into view, I scream. Looking at the Lake, and the other shore, which you can barely see in the distance, makes me realize that this is a very formidable bike journey and we have done it! We are practically there! And no flats along the way!
The finish line… Landscapers rolling through…
This was a great moment. Then Marty and I treated ourselves to a 10 minute massage right away at an on-site masseuse. Then, dazed, we collected ourselves and got ready for dinner.
That night we gorged on bread and cheese fondue, before Hsiao-Chien and Horng- Shen Tu and Marty ate escargot for the first time. YUM. The snails were a preview of the good dishes that followed, shrimp scampi and pasta alfredo: we couldn’t help but indulge the heavy cream sauce. Eyes were definitely droopy and faces were red from wind and sun. On the walk back to the hotel we all caught an eyeful of the bright stars that we never get to see back home. A beautiful day for Americas most beautiful bike ride!
If you are now convinced that you should join forces with Team in Training for the Lake Tahoe Century ride next year, you may direct any questions that you have to me or Marty… we would love to have you join us in 2009!
Go Team!!
To see the complete photo log of the trip, use this link: Landscapers Lake Tahoe Century Album
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Stuck in the Sand- the sequel
A fellow blogger has inspired some thoughts about the nature of suffering… she is going through an extremely tough time and I feel, reading her posts, that I can relate to her struggle. Not the physical, but the mental. And thats half the game.
Like me, she is probably her own worst critic. Our expectations turn into frustrations with the same ease that the wind changes direction. We hound ourselves for making a mistake, doing something wrong, letting our guard down, losing control, just being human. And usually there is no one to blame but ourselves, so we lay it on thick. “We are impatient with ourselves in ways that we would never be with another person.”
We throw ourselves into the quicksand because it is an oh-so-familiar way of being when things aren’t turning out the way we want them to. In my case, once I’m in, my body launches into the typical stress response: adrenal glands start pumping, blood pressure increases, mind races, and I can’t quiet my mind. Thats being stuck in the quicksand. If it is sustained for a good length of time, its maddening.
When I feel like I am stuck in the sand I try my hardest to to back up, lay off, breathe deep, and accept the situation, whatever it is. Say it: this situation is fucked up. I didn’t want this to happen. Thats it. I’m not saying I fall in love with the situation, I just recognize it for what it is.
Once I realize its a thing, I can start to distance myself from it, or let go of it. It is so hard, because I love my quicksand…its so familiar to me. I have been mapping that brain path for decades! Once I begin to let go, there is less suffering, I can see the world around me, the sky is blue, the sky is gray, whatever. I am working on this very diligently, it takes absolute mindfulness to realize that each sand patch is an opportunity to undo the desire to throw myself in it.
The only thing we have control of in our lives are our minds, everything else is just obeying some laws of physics. It all goes away just as easily as it comes. How our mind spends its time here is our own doing… and we may not be able to control the physical world, but we can certainly control our reaction to it! Who is the person that I want to be? Certainly not the one that ruminates over each mistake, disappointment, or personal disaster that happens. If all we have is time, then I want to make the best of it…less suffering and more happiness. Is that possible? Yes.
I opened Kabbat-Zinn’s Coming to Our Senses this morning and found the passage of the day. About dukkha he writes:
“Buddhists have a remarkable and extremely useful word for the dis-ease stemming from being filled with desire, from being fastened to a dying animal, and not knowing what we are. They call it dukkha…which is rendered by scholars as suffering, anguish, stress, malaise, dis-ease, and unsatisfactoriness. All buddhist meditative practices revolve around the recognition of the dukkha, the identification of its root causes, and the description, development, and deployment of pathways whereby we might become free from its oppressive, blinding, and imprisoning influences. These pathways are all one pathway really, a method aimed at awakening us to what we have been keeping secret or hidden from ourselves by paying attention wisely to whatever arises in our experience, instead of what we usually tend to do, which is either not pay attention to it at all, or alternatively, to wallow in it, romanticize it, quietly and hopelessly endure it, struggle against it, downright drown in it, or endlessly distract ourselves to escape from it. Such a pathway offers the possibility of leading a far more satisfying and authentic life. So, the truth of the universality of the dukkha is not some maudlin and passive bemoaning of its inevitability-precisely because this dissatisfaction is neither enduring or intrinsically limiting. It can be worked with, even in its most horrific aspects. It can become our teacher. It can serve to show us how we can free ourselves from its grasp.”
And to finish… I will re-post a fantastic poem by Rumi that was posted by Tay, the inspiration of this post, which says it all…
The Guesthouse
This being human is a guesthouse
Every morning a new arrival
A joy, a depression, a meanness
Some momentary awareness
Comes as an unexpected visitor
Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they’re a crowd of sorrows
Who violently sweep your house
Empty of its furniture
Still treat each guest honorably
He may be cleaning you out
For some new delight!
The dark thought, the shame, the malice
Meet them at the door laughing
And invite them in
Be grateful for whoever comes
Because each has been sent
As a guide from the beyond
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Good and Bad News in the Times
Non-Hodgkin’s Lymphoma on the Rise, Along With Prospects for a Cure
Although NHL is on the rise, the prospects for treatment are improving. Same old news. The key here is “no one knows why.” What bothers me about the same old news, is that there is still such a dearth of evidence of what is causing it. What has happened to the science of disease prevention? If the number of cases is increasing by 1 to 2 percent annually, why are we not racing to find the cause as well as the cure?
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Touched by Support
Thanks to all my wine and cheese loving friends, the winetasting at Moore Brothers was a huge success and I met my fundrasing goal of $5,000! I have to say, I have never experienced such an amount of support from so many people before in my entire life. I think somewhere between 60 and 70 people came! All I can say is that it truly was one of the most special nights ever, I was deeply touched. There is something incredibly powerful about bringing people together when you are in need. This was the first time I have done so, and I discovered what a boost it can be. And I’m not talking about the monetary donations, but the show of support and care by my friends just being there. This whole commitment has been about more than cycling and fundraising, it has given me the chance to share myself and connect to others more. Definitely a good thing!
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